Favoritism & Erasure
Only four parshiyot in this week, we reach Vayera – following a journey of the promised birth of Sarah’s son by blood (since, technically, Ishmael was Sarah’s son through her שפחה, “maidservant,” Hagar) through the Akedah, which in Genesis 22:2 includes this instruction from G!d to Abraham:
Then [G!d] said, “Take your son, your one son*, whom you love, Isaac, and go (for yourself) to the land of Moriah. Offer him (Isaac) there as a burnt offering atop one of the mountains which I will tell (to) you.”
During a drash on Vayera focusing on love (אהב) being used to describe something done to or by Isaac more than any other character in the Torah, I was distracted by the (correct) translation, perhaps even interpretation, of the descriptor before the love Abraham bestowed (אֲשֶׁר־אָהַ֙בְתָּ֙) on Isaac: אֶת־יְחִֽידְךָ֤. As the speaker translated the Hebrew as “your only son,” I felt myself flinch, a bodily reaction to the erasure in the text of both Ishmael and Hagar. In last week’s parsha (which I didn’t write about in detail), the text recounts the stories of Ishmael’s birth and circumcision. In this week’s parsha, Sarah gives birth to Isaac, and then sends Hagar and Ishmael away – before the Akedah. I am just beginning deeper research into women like Hagar, the שפחות and אמהת and נשים/אשה (used for women/wives of all “ranks”) and פלגשים, and their relationships to women like Sarah, as well as the men who surround them. The texts, inasmuch as we can understand how they were read and passed down, as well as interpretations and traditions of them throughout history, offer windows into our past, present, and future valuation of people, societal structure, and everything that falls by the wayside – out of sight, sometimes even into disappearance.
In a closer look at the women of this parsha, they are each individually, and arguably as a group, in situations that leave them taken advantage of, offered as tribute, put in dangerous situations, cast aside:
Hagar is cast out with Ishmael, left to starve in the desert…
Lot’s daughters are offered to the strangers in Sodom and Gomorrah…
Lot’s wife becomes a pillar of salt…
Sarah is lied about (not the only time) in the presence of a king…
These moments, along with other aspects of the stories, offer insight regarding the treatment of women in these texts. In connection with Hagar’s disappearance from the text, I found myself drawn into the portrayal of women in the text and the ease with which I – and I dare say we – often read these stories, so used to the inequality in society that we may feel sad but perhaps don’t ask enough “WHY” questions.
Genesis 18-22, contained in the section of Bereshit we ascribe to the narrative of Abraham, contains hints of the life of women:
Sarah’s laughter, to anger and protectiveness, her role as a peace offering to Abimelech…
Hagar’s complete despair, to a hope and promise given to her…
Lot’s daughters offered to complete strangers, to their decision to consort with their father…
Lot’s wife as a barely-mentioned character, to her destruction as an exemplar…
How many other women in this world lived stories of which we are completely unaware, not even searching for clues? How do we open our eyes more often to the forgotten, erased, unmentioned – in our stories, and all the moreso, in our everyday lives?
Balcony moments in Eldridge Street Shul
*Sefaria and other translations sometimes provide the adjective describing Abraham’s son Isaac as “favored” or “favorite” – but this is not an exact translation and rather informed by context. יְחִֽידְךָ֤, from אחד, refers to the number one, or the idea of a sole entity.